Are you feeling like a leader? I hope so, because I am convinced that you are! Sometimes when we look at our lives our insecurities get the best of us and make us think we aren't good enough to be a leader. Remember, though, we aren't looking at leadership in the sense of being in a role or position. We look at it in terms of how we are making an impact on others, how much influence we have with those around us or how we are making a difference in someone's life or memory. That's genuine leadership in it's best sense...it's quiet leadership.

When you think of developing your inner leader, think of how you "show up" in your circle of influence. Think about how many people listen when you speak. Think about the friends you hang with or the family that respects you. If you are in business, think about the coworkers that value your opinion. If you are active in your church, what groups or members benefit from your presence and personality? If you were to look through your life, you might find several areas or opportunities where you may develop your inner leader and take on a role of quiet leadership.

Developing our inner leader is a lifelong process. Perhaps these tips may resonate with your walk, but if by chance they don't, maybe you'd consider an area or two you wish to adopt and focus on for some personal development.

Forgive Until it Hurts No More - This is one of the most difficult hurdles to master, but figuring out the forgiveness piece is one of the most gratifying hurdles we can learn. If we find a way to get past the hurt of being wronged, we are not only freeing ourselves from the burden and obsession, but we are also releasing that grudge and welcoming the harmony that follows. Leaders find ways to make peace and many times it takes forgiveness to get that peaceful relationship.

Give Like You've Never Given - Leaders are givers. We give our heart, our time, our resources, our energy and sometimes our money - without strings attached. It's about helping others become better people, and by giving of ourselves we show others how important they are. As we mentioned earlier, in "D" - it's important to develop our self in such a way that we stay healthy as a support to others. When giving, we must remember to set boundaries, too. It's about finding balance.

Hear with Your heart. Listen. Really listen. Many times, we might "hear" what someone is saying, but we don't listen with our hearts. Sometimes we hear the words, but the mind chatter has a well-thought out answer by the time the other person is finished speaking. If we are thinking of our answer, we really aren't "present" and hearing what they are really saying. Leaders take the time to be fully present in mind, body and emotion in order to fully support those around us. Are you a good listener?

Include Outsiders - Leaders find a way to include outsiders, and make others feel welcome and part of the group. It's never fun to feel left out or not be part of the conversation. If we look around at the meeting, in our family circles, or among our peers, perhaps there is someone who tends to be hanging around on the edges and not saying very much, or maybe there is someone that is consistently missing from every activity. Take a risk and try to include them somehow. Sometimes it's safer for that person to keep a distance, but a leader will at least open that door and invite them to participate. Being aware of non-participators shows a keen sense of relationship and compassion for others.

Journey Deliberately and with Purpose - We are all on a journey, and some of us let that journey just happen. Some of us take action on that journey and do our best to make the most of it. Those that are developing their inner leader will be aware of their personal journey and will do everything it takes to figure out the lessons that we learn from the obstacles along the way. True leaders will realize that it's not the journey that's important, but it's the lessons, the people, the passions, the relationships and experience we've gained along the way that are the most important.

Hopefully, we can each adapt some of these ABC's to our own life and own up to the power we have as a leader. We are each a work in progress, and sometimes the self-development we walk through can be challenging, but hopefully each of us will see how much influence we have in our own circle of friends, coworkers, and families and then we may use that influence for making a positive impact --even if it's through quiet leadership.